Kid: Tell me a story Daddy! Dad: Only if you promise you'll be good tonight Kid: I will, I will! Dad: OK, which story do you want me to tell Kid: The one about the Birth of Halo:Reach Dad: Well the story goes a little like this... The Birth of Reach One day, the Bungie chefs were cooking up a batch of Awesomesauce to feed the employees. Bungie were deciding which game they would make next. This was a time before Forge 2.0, and Stockpile was but an inkling in the mind of Lehto. Sketch was walking around the HQ when he smelt the delicious smell of awesome in his nose. He hurried to the kitchen and, when the chefs weren't looking, took a sip, but accidentally, a bit of the powdered Win in his pocket fell into the mix. He realised and snuck away before he was noticed. That night, when the Bungie employees settled down for their dinner, Sketch was worried. What if they could taste the Win? Urk sat down on his chair and began to tuck in to his Awesomesauce. Suddenly, he stood up and shouted "who put Win in the sauce?". All employees looked at Stosh. "It was you, wasn't it Stosh?". But Stosh had had enough. Everyone always blamed him for everything. He snapped. He overturned all the tables and ran out in a deranged mess. But Urk's wrath was not over. He looked in his pocket, to see if his Halo 3 disc had any sauce on it. Unfortunately, it was covered. Sketch snickered and said aloud "They'll never know it was me!" All employees looked at him and the realisation of this appeared in Urk's eyes. "Sketch!" he shouted in a booming voice. "On behalf of Bungie, you are FIRED!". Later on that night, Urk tried desperately to salvage his disc, but the Win just wouldn't come off. He finally gave in, and put the disc in the XBOX just to make sure it was broken. But something amazing happened. The Win had changed the programming of the disc, and the menu for the new game, called "Halo: Reach" popped up. Bungie was amazed and the game went Gold straight away. After Stosh recovered, he was promoted and Bungie lived happily ever after... Kid:Wow Dad! That was amazing! Tell me another! Dad: Well, alright then. What one Kid: Birth of the Vehicles Dad: Thats a pretty long one, but OK The Birth of the Falcon In the beginning of Halo 3, there was a young newcomer called the Hornet. Her arial prowess was second to none, and even Scorpions feared the buzz of her ducted air fans. She was, for a long time, the favourite vehicle for all. But one day, the Bungie employees were talking about here power. Sage, who was just returning from the beard trimmers overheard and took drastic nerfing action. He stripped her of her missiles, and smashed her machine-guns with his Banhammer. She was no longer a sky-worthy vehicle, and all of the Banshees taunted her and showed her how they had KEPT their missiles. She gradually became more subdued, and retreated into her home, Avalanche. However, a kindly Pelican saw her grief, and had pity sex with her behind the Covy base. Even though they had used contraception, they had a small baby, which was nicknamed "Falcon". He had all of the arial prowess of his mother, and all the strength and carrying ability of his father. But his parents did not want him, and they abandoned him outside Bungie HQ. Urk saw the Falcon, and took him under his wing. Due to his persuasion, the Falcon auditioned for the part of UNSC flying vehicle during the filming of Reach, and they gave him the part. However after the filming of the campaign, Sage, because he was bitter about the Hornet, nerfed it's child. He used the Banhammer to smash off the chingun, and took away it's ability to carry five. However, the Falcon remained strong and continued the filming for multiplayer. One day it stole the Banhammer and used it to nerf Sage's beard, and he was distraught. The Falcon now resides in south-west Forgeworld and can be spawned a total of eight times. Kid: I love your stories Dad! Tell me one more! Dad: Ok. But it's September 14th tomorrow, Daddy needs his sleep if he's going to play Reach. One more, then bed. The Birth of the Revenant The filming of the Halo 2 multiplayer had just finished. The Spectre and Wraith were having a slow fulfilling relationship. When Halo 3 began auditions, the Spectre was not called up, but his younger, higher definition cousin the Prowler took his role. One night the Spectre returned home to find them in a frenzy of hot plasma filled "steering". The Spectre was ashamed of his girlfriend and left for the new pastures of Halo Reach to get a fresh start. The Prowler decided it would be best if he left Halo for good. After hooking up with Chopper, he drove to a place where his barefaced cheating would be accepted, Mexico. The Wraith went to apologise to the Spectre in the hope of salvaging their relationship, and eventually the Spectre forgave her. They had a child who was known as the Revenant to all who asked, but, because the Spectre secretly forgave his cousin, his real name was Prowler Jr. Both the Spectre and Wraith were called upon to be in Reach, but Sage nerfed the Spectre so much it was crippled. It was forced to quit filming, and Bungie had a dilemma. But Prowler Jr offered to replace his father and was accepted. The Spectre died of his wounds, but he died proud of his son. Dad: Ok son, I've told you the three stories. Kid: But what about the story of Boardwalk and Countdown Dad: I'll tell you after Gamescon, goodnight... The Previous Night Kid: Daddy, I'm so excited for Reach! Dad: So am I son Kid: But Dad, I've got a question, where do DMR's come from Dad: Sigh, I knew this day would come. This is a sacred moment between a father and son... BR was only forteen when he was hit by what is called Buffing. He became stronger and fired faster, and mag capacity started growing in his private parts. He had many odd feelings, which confused him. He became more volatile and began to realise that his Father Sniper was very embarrasing. He also noticed that he became interested in guns of the opposite race. One particular gun, the Carbine made him swoon. He asked her out and she said yes, and they spent years together. They went to the ice-cream social, the reloading couples group and many other fulfilling activities. But they never ruined it by giving into their throbbing mechanical urges. Eventually Carbine and BR got married, and one night on the gun rack, they shared clips and spent a night of bliss together in each other's scopes. They had a child, who was nicknamed DMR, and was given the headshot capabilities of his mother and the sleek black design of his father. On the night the auditions for Reach began, there was a knock on the door of their storage facility. The Carbine opened it, and outside was a tiny little child. He had Needles protruding from his head, just like the Needler, but had the long, elegant shape of the Carbine. Inside the case in which he was presented lay a message comprised of needle bullets. "I can no longer take care of our child. Please take him and treat him with the care and respect you treat your husband's son. Best regards, Needle.N.Needler". The Carbine had feared this day would come, and unwillingly showed her husband the note. The BR could no longer live with such pain, so he nerfed himself to death. The Carbine, in honour of their father, auditioned both children for the role of medium to long range UNSC and Covenant gun and they both got the role. And both children wished their mother had had the foresight to never share clips before marriage, because she ended up doing something she'd regret. Kid: Wow, that's amazing. Dylan only comes from Manhattan! Enjoy!
Thankyou, It's nice to know I'm appreciated. More stories added after Gamescom. Do you want gun or map stories?
New Story added to OP. Working on "The Birth of the Rocket Hog" Thanks for the positive feedback. Powdered Win lol.