I think I'd become a bird, a big bird, so that when I take a dump it's a massive one and then try and hit people with my massive load.
I think I'd become a bird, a big bird, and become the most badass dude on the street. Sesame represent. Anybody up for an avatar craze of Sesame Street? If so I'm elmo.
Actually I might go with Snuffy (The snuffleupagus) or Grover (in Old Spice form) and shat, his name is Beaker and hes a muppet, not a sesame street