I like it, could be longer, I think if thats the introduction to all your videos you could make the particles fly towards the screen then the words and as if you were coming through the clouds like in the movies showing an overveiw of a town or something, you could overveiw a map and then get into the action.. Just a thought ;p
I think if your going to be using this in montages it would go good with some quiet music for the opening going in to some loud **** would be kl ;p
I can tell when watching the video where you ended it then copy and pasted to make it seem longer. I have worked with this before for my own entros. I can tell this is most likly Adobe After Effects.
It is well made, I will have to assume you used Adobe After Affects? However, it is unoriginal. I have seen countless people introduce their "clans" their montages, their film production companies, etc. using a similar style. It's not that you have done anything inherently wrong, but a more original concept would have been a relief. I can't really provide suggestions, though I may return with a few of my favorite. If there is anything I can advise, I guess it would be to make it more immersible. Your name is Overcast Halo, and when I think of that I think of clouds. You have somewhat touched based on overcast darkness with the shafts of light, but that's all they are. There is no indication to the cause of the shafts of light. Figure out how to incorporate the name more in the animation and overall design.
Now mix them both together and do the faading thing I said with the music and you have yourself a winner