This is my first Montage and I did all of the editing myself! I am pretty happy about it and am in the process of making one with just me in it.
For a first attempt, it's not bad. Here's a list of cruel, evil constructive criticism - Make more use of the music. It's the exact same thing with or without the music, and I have to say i'm not a huge fan of genericy sounding music. Find a track that's bold and out there. Orchestral rock, try kash117 or liberatingpulse, (my main contacts) - Invest in editing software. Windows movie maker just don't cut it - Transitions are always, always bad. Use it for comedy, or better yet never, or your video seems somewhat amateur (sorry if that sounds cruel) - Clips are good. Try filming it in third person to give us a better view of it - Too long. This is a personal opinion, but I for one don't have the time to sit through 7 minutes and 23 seconds of droll. - Don't leave your name there, especially in a boring, standard font. Make a watermark and stick it on the corner. Hope that helps!
More specifically? Vegas Pro, platinum, etc. Sorry to be nosy, i'm always interested in what people use.