Who here reads it? I personally have fallen in love with this site. If only stuff like this happened to me... Share your favs and discuss... Some of my favs... Spoiler MW2 Lol Spoiler Today, I skipped school to go out and by the new Call of Duty and play it the entire day. Apparently, my physics teacher did the same. While in the checkout lines of Target, we shared a look of silent understanding. I have a feeling neither of us will be found out. MLIA Maturity Lol Spoiler Today, I saw an ice cream truck pulling out of my apartment complex. I live in college apartments and i've never seen such a scared face as the lady driving the truck because there was at least 50 people chasing her. I love my college. MLIA God Win Spoiler Yesterday I went to the dollar store to pick out 16 presents for my friend's 16th birthday. As an inside joke, one of the presents was The Holy Bible. When I went to check out, there was no barcode on the Bible, but the lady checking me out said, "Well, I guess you can't put a price on eternal salvation". I got the Bible for free. MLIA. Maturity Lol 2 Spoiler Today, while in the grocery store I asked my mom if I could sit in the cart. She said no, that it was too childish and I was too old. Not even five seconds later I saw my best friend being pushed in a cart by her mom while licking a large rainbow lollipop. She just got accepted into law school.MLIA Best Buy Win Spoiler Today, while I was relaxing in the cafeteria before my next class, I overhead a group of students talking about getting a bunch of people together. No, they were not planning a party, they were planning to all dress up in blue button down shirts and invade Best Buy pretending to be employees. I want to know who these people are and join them. MLIA So I will probably keep this list updated as much as possible Submitted Favs: Spoiler Irony Lol Spoiler "Today, I came home to find my sister screaming at our dog for ripping up her Twilight book... our dogs name is Buffy. I laughed at the irony. MLIA" Wrong Kind of Balls Spoiler "Today I got paid to follow an old guy around and wash his balls.......... Its okay because I am a golf caddy... MLA"
Been reading for a long time... the best one is something like "Today, I came home to find my sister screaming at our dog for ripping up her Twilight book... our dogs name is Buffy. I laughed at the irony. MLIA" That's the only one i properly remember though.
I submitted mine to that site a while back: "Today... I went to BJs.... They did not give me a BJ... MLA..." My favorites: "Today I saw a pineapple, Spongebob wasn't inside.... MLA" "Today I got paid to follow an old guy around and wash his balls.......... Its okay because I am a golf caddy... MLA" "Today I ate a grape, I did not jizz in my pants."
I'd be so much more entertained with sites such as these if I was sure all of them were true. For example: THAT is funny if it actually happened. It's somewhat less funny if it is just a made-up story, which it probably is.
i'd be so much more entertained with these sites if they weren't all the same formula. Cutesy ancedote + reassurance and relation to reader
Today, a phone rang in my calculus class. The class went dead silent as one boy took out a banana and started having a conversation with it. A commotion started up as he walked out into the hallway, to which he turned around and said "Excuse me, I'm trying to talk here." before leaving the room and not coming back for the rest of the period. MLIA BANANA PHONE!
<death09>my girlfriend broke up with me and sent me pix of her and her new boyfriend in bed <ktp753>ouch. <death09>yeah.i sent them to her dad <JonTG> Man, my ***** is so big if I laid it out on a keyboard it'd go all the way from A to Z <JonTG> wait, **** <MooseOnDaLoose> Hey Mike <goatboy> what? <MooseOnDaLoose> *****. <goatboy> er? <MooseOnDaLoose> *****. <goatboy> and? <MooseOnDaLoose> *****. <goatboy> ... <MooseOnDaLoose> *****. <goatboy> i dont get it <MooseOnDaLoose> AND YOU NEVER WILL. <goatboy> bastard <ckx> women ask for it <ckx> they act all old and mature <ckx> and then you stick your **** up their ass <ckx> and they get all bitchy <ckx> "I"M ONLY 13, I'M ONLY 13!!!" *** Topic in #doghouse is 'Our hearts are extended to the 17 victims of the recent internet fraud' * Anubis has joined #doghouse <Anubis> what fraud? <Kadmium> You haven't heard about it? <Anubis> no? <Kadmium> You can read the full story at http://www.tubgirl.com <Anubis> omg wtf! *** Kadmium changes topic to 'Our hearts are extended to the 18 victims of the recent internet fraud' <VolteFace`> don't you hate it when you **** on the floor, and you can hear it fall but you have no idea where it actually landed, and spend like 5 minutes looking for it <peng> ... <peng> what? <VolteFace`> oh **** <VolteFace`> don't you hate it when you DROP **** <cassius_clay13> so I was with my friend bryan the other night in a bar <cassius_clay13> well he got really drunk and said he was gonna puke <cassius_clay13> so i helped him walk to the toilet <cassius_clay13> all the stalls were occupied <emoti_conartist> lol <cassius_clay13> bryan is a rugby player... so a big guy <cassius_clay13> so he ****ing KICKS one of the stall doors open <cassius_clay13> and there's this guy in there taking a **** <emoti_conartist> hahahahahaha <cassius_clay13> and bryan throws up ALL OVER HIM <cassius_clay13> then (this is genius) bryan thinks 'oh ****... if i were taking a **** and someone came in and was sick all over me, i'd want to **** him up... so i'd better hit him first' <cassius_clay13> so he ****ing SMACKS this guy in the face <cassius_clay13> and runs away <cassius_clay13> imagine being that guy... WORST NIGHT OUT EVER IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance" IronChef Foicite: but a potato! IronChef Foicite: potatos last for ****ing ever, man IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow **** even if you just leave them in the sack IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol IronChef Foicite: but there's more! IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it! IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you" IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you" <WiLdSeXyPrInCeSs> i luv guyz where would they be wifout us gals??? <XeNoX> Still in the Garden Of Eden you gullible *****. * Porter is now known as PorterWITHGIRLFRIENDWHOISHOT <Strayed> he shot his girlfriend? <Mikkel> If you went camping and you got REALLY drunk with your friend and you woke up the next morning with a condom stuck up your ass would you tell anybody? <Celestya> i dont think so <Mikkel> Wanna go camping? <glacial> I love school <glacial> Today our term paper due date's set <glacial> Our instructor says that we WILL hand in the paper on time, and she'll accept no excuses except illness, with a note from our doctor, or a death in the immediate family, with a note from the dead member. <glacial> So this wiseass pipes up: "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?" <glacial> She waits for the laughs to die down and says: <glacial> "Well, I guess you'll have to learn to write with your other hand" <Fashykekes> Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.." All old, but meh.
<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!! <Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key <Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!! <Judge-Mental> **** me <Th3No0b> Im going to be the next hitler <Th3No0b> Im going to kill all the jews and 1 clown <RageAgainsttheAmish> why the clown <Th3No0b> See? no one cares about the jews <RageAgainsttheAmish> lmao (old) < robT> Name ONE thing that your windows comp can do that my MAC cant < bawss> Right click. <NHBoy> I broke my G-string while fingering a minor <rycool> ... <NHBoy> I was trying to play Knocking on Heaven's Door. <NHBoy> Oh well, time to buy new strings. <frank> can you help me install GTA3? <knightmare> first, shut down all programs you aren't using frank has quit IRC. (Quit) <knightmare> ...
<Phyxius> Hmm there are some black people hanging around outside the gates at the end of my driveway, brb <Courtney> mkay hb <Phyxius> HOLY **** THEYRE GONE <Courtney> The black people? <Phyxius> NO, MY GATES <Merrick> Only reason I ever payed attention in economics was so I could learn how to merchant in Runescape <Andries> jesus if i can run this myspace page i could probs run crysis * Vesper is now known as CodyB <Teku> why the nick change? <CodyB> I'm teaching this hot chick how to use IRC <xanatos> ...why <CodyB> I got grounded for two weeks and I can't call anyone. I figured I could talk to her here, at least. <CodyB> be cool, I'm teaching her about channels and she might come in here <xanatos> how did you get grounded <CodyB> I locked my sister outside for three hours. <xanatos> i bet she didnt like that * StacyF has joined #randomshit <CodyB> yeah I thought my parents were going to kill me <CodyB> oh hey, there you are <Teku> So you had sex with your sister on your parents bed and they walked in on you? Wow Cody, you're lucky you only got grounded for two weeks. <StacyF> eeew you sick **** * StacyF has left #randomshit <Teku> I know you're going to kill me later, but it was so worth it <CodyB> you motherfucker thrasher: I'm thinking of starting a business in california thrasher: it would be a socialist abortion clinic and pot dispensary, with new gay marriage chapel kthxglhf: And dry cleaning thrasher: why dry cleaning? kthxglhf: so u can reuse coat hangers Connor: Firefox 3.5. Download it. Andrew: Give me the top 5 reasons to download it. True: In iambic pentameter Connor: For private browsing, tear-off tabs and then some, Connor: Download Firefox three point five and see: Connor: It's using Gecko one point nine point one, Connor: And over twice as fast as Firefox three. Connor: Pwned. <NimF> The lesbians next door bought me a rolex for my birthday. <NimF> I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch...
I think someone may be listening to my conversations at lunch cause we talked about doing that best buy one.
<Domsey> Woah, I got the weirdest moment of my entire life this morning <bender> what happened? <Domsey> you know, there was a party at my neighbours' last night <bender> yeah, you've been ****ing drunk.. <Domsey> you've been there, too? <bender> sure... <Domsey> well, you see i can't remember anything <Domsey> but this morning I woke up in my bed, and there was my mom lying next to me. <bender> wtf...? <Domsey> That's exactly what i thought <Domsey> So, my mom got up instantly when i woke up, smiled at me and said "U're so much better than your dad is." then she left the room <bender> OMFG!!! <bender> you didnt do that! TELL ME IT WASNT LIKE THAT!!! TELL ME YOU'RE A DUMBASS LIAR!!! <Domsey> no, i'm not lying <bender> OMG!!! <Domsey> but it turned out she was playing a trick on me. Paycheck for coming home late, all drunk. <bender> ... <bender> your mom's such a freak. WallJam7: roses are red WallJam7: violets are blue WallJam7: all of my base WallJam7: are belong to you <Edofnor> #1 pickup line of all time: "Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you? * @Lan plays with his privates. <Rintaun> ... <@Lan> I got these new toy soldiers <@Lan> They are really neat <N> which is correct, seven and five IS thirteen, or seven and five ARE thirteen? <Joker> Neither. <Joker> Because it's twelve. <ebim> toz.. do her doggie style and have a laptop on her back so you can talk to us Mjordan2nd: If you could be any fictional character, who would you be? Chris: Spider Man Tim: batman Sidd: batman Mjordan2nd: I'd be god