The following several paragraphs are from a recent post made by my wonderful and incredibly talented sister, who despite her occasional bitchiness, is one of my best friends. I'm not sure where else to post this, but discussion is welcome. I just felt the need to share this with people. The world is weird, and death sucks. I have spent the better part of a year wondering what I am going to do with my life, and struggling with how to jump start the process of growing up. But in my mind, I have had the thought that it really wasn’t that important, because I am young, and I have plenty of time to figure out life.* But recently I have started thinking, what if I don’t have as much time as I think? Four days ago, a friend of mine was tragically killed in a car accident. The same accident also claimed the life of his 14 year old brother. My friend was 18 years old. We graduated high school almost two months ago.* Their death has had a tremendous effect on our town, specifically, our peers. Because for all of us, it is damn near impossible to think that someone so young is even capable of dying. We hear about it happening elsewhere, but*here?* To me, however silly it sounds, it boils down to the simple fact that, as young people, we have a*tendency*to think of ourselves as immortal beings, existing out of time. We are all under the age of twenty, we don’t have to fear death, simply because we are young. And it is absolutely shocking to be shaken awake; to realize death can touch us, and it can strike twice.* To lose one young person is profoundly sad. To lose two at once, two brothers, is*heartbreaking. I know without a doubt that my heart has been broken this week by these events. Knowing someone you saw nearly every day and casually spoke with and made jokes with and laughed with is just*gone*hurts your heart, and to know he left without even saying goodbye hurts even more. We worked together, we annoyed each other and our coworkers together, and now, there is an empty spot that is just void of his presence.* However, after several sleepless nights, I have come to realize something: these events that happen in life, the ones that shake us awake, are tragic, but they are nonetheless important. I know that I am examining things a little more carefully, even in the last four days. I have started reevaluating aspects of my life. And I have this sad affair to thank for opening my eyes.* My peers talk a lot about life, and living it the fullest, but when it comes down to it, we typically don’t. With the death of our friend, I encourage my peers to rethink the little things, because it has never been more clear to us that life it unbelievably short. And those little things matter.* Don’t put things off; live in the moment. Try not to deny yourself the*opportunity to have a good time. Don’t be unapologetically reckless. Above all else, tell the people you care about how much they really mean, because you never know when the chance to say it will be gone.* I have realized how weird the world is in the last few days. But I have also learned that it is weird for a reason, and no matter how much death sucks, it can always show us something a little brighter after the storm.*
That's some deep stuff there. Your sister is a good writer. She makes some good points as well. There was a incident that I had personally and she describes the feelings of being shaken awake perfectly.
I am sorry for your town's loss. I'm sure your sister would know that it is not the impact of your life that matters, but the implications of it. Here is the music from the 90's that I relate to so much - whether or not you decide to listen to it: Nirvana - Something in the Way Soundgarden - Blow Up The Outside World Alice In Chains - Would? Pearl Jam - Sleight of Hand Audioslave - Doesn't Remind Me The last one is a personal favorite.
A lot of the earlier music I remember from when I was little is from around that time, that transition period where the whole 90's and early 2000's rock scene began to shift into pop. Many of those artists, especially Audioslave and Soundgarden, are always incredibly nostalgic for me, even though I never listened to them other than when they came on the radio which, back then, was almost all the time. That music always reminds me of the time before I was even in kindergarden. I had no concept of time and all the days sort of just melted together.
Soundgarden and Audioslave remain to be my most cherished bands. The grunge movement especially carried this existentialist ideology that I found fitting to myself. I actually listened to Doesn't Remind Me for the very first time while walking the streets of Japan in Tokyo - no clue where I was lol. It was very fitting, considering the first line of the song. At that point, I instantly became a fan in a land I had great fervor for.
Hate to be the one to say it, but that was not very good writing at all. Typical high school crap from someone who lost a friend in high school. People died when i was in high school too, also from a car accident. Everyone said boo hoo, and wrote little crap like this. In fact, it was IDENTICAL. The kids who died, they died because they were trying to climb from the window of a pickup truck, to the back part of it, while the car was moving and they were drunk. The school and the whole town mourned the loss of these intelligent individuals who had such a bright future.
I wish I could write something as succinctly as Titmar that expresses how shallow and inane these "death of a classmate" fallout situations are, but I doubt I can. Oh well, you win some, you try-to-climb-to-the-back-part-of-a-ute-from-the-window-and-die some.
This doesn't have to affect you, but how dare you disregard the feelings other people are experiencing as 'typical'. You know 'nothing' of these people to lay your judgement down. In fact, why don't you explain your sentiment directly to the mother of these deceased brothers? It's the mentality like yours that has suppressed and humiliated people since the beginning of human civilization, for no reason other than to state your negativity. Do you have to appreciate the post? Of course not, you don't have to say 'anything' at all.
Of course, my sister wasn't the only one to wright a long, spur of the moment, "meaningful" post on the web about how good a friend they were, how sad it is to see a peer die, etc, etc. The older brother, along with his younger sibling was driving when he merged into a semi, killing both of them on impact. I can't imagine what the middle child, one of my peers, is going through. But my sister isn't shallow and inane. In fact, when she's not emotionally distraught and loosing sleep from the death of one of her friends, she's quite a fantastic writer.
If you're quoting her directly, I beg to differ. It has all the forced and therefore hollow emotion of a highschool graduation speech, about twice as many cliches, and overall the whole thing comes off as more than a little trite. Where does her pain bleed on the page? Where's the gut wrenching humanity of it all? Or is that too high a standard for Facebook.
No, and nor did it ever cross my mind that any sort of writing other than site updates and map features brimming with sarcasm could ever be high enough standard for Forgehub. I just thought maybe once, all those big meanies would leave me alone to wallow in teenage angst with the other kids.
This entire thread would not exist if you had just once, thought about maybe hamster or a goldfish. Death can't touch us... sure, us few white middle-class westernised individuals.
how dare you disregard MY feelings? what makes this jerks feelings any more important than mine? it's mentality like YOURS that suppresses people. why are certain opinions okay, and others not? go **** yourself. <3
How the heck did he manage to merge straight into an oncoming semi? That's almost as bad as Titmar's LOL-look-at-me-jump-into-a-truckbed-while-it's-moving story.
Story didn't really achieve anything for me but as humans we need to share our experiences and talk about things so I'm glad shes able to share her story get it off her chest and hope she knows other people been though similar situations. Not as cool as other deaths in thread but during school a girl had crush on me and i lead her on for probably a year because i was to shy to say i didn't like her then one day she died waiting at hospital made me feel like a **** wit and i still do.
Nice writeup and if it meant something to you then do well with it. I can't say it'll do a whole lot for others as most people have known some sort of death near them, but it's good to reflect and learn from these experiences. Good luck to you and your sister.
I didn't state any opinion or feelings were better as some allotment to a superior apparatus, despite that you've defended yourself with no reasonable intention other than to piss people off. I am 'perfectly' fine with you having an opinion, but when that opinion is turned into an insult - not merely a suggestion, but as a form of bullying only to emotionally traumatize someone, I am NOT okay with it. That's why your post wasn't okay - not because it was an opinion, but because it was an insult for absolutely no reason.
as insulted as you might feel by titmar's initial post, he was right. experiencing far too many deaths of friends, family, and acquaintances, i can tell you that knowing somebody who died isn't a get-away-from-honesty free card. it's DEFINITELY not a gain sympathy or respect card which some can see this as. it sucks, it's life, and people who write **** about it can really piss others off. it trivializes death when its made public on the internet like this. you're right, he knows nothing of those people to lay judgements, which is why you shouldn't have posted it. if i were to die and somebody wrote and showed off **** about it, id be ****ing pissed. That **** should be kept personal, it means far more that way.