You know how people in movies will sometimes **** a shotgun with one hand by just grabbing it and moving their hand up and down? It is the most badass thing in the world. I feel like a lesser man when I see that. I see that and think to myself "what have I done in my life? This man has earned his right to existence, and I'm just sitting here pretending to be content with my pathetic excuse for a life". I sometimes take long walks, reflecting on my actions, asking myself life's big questions. How much ammo do I need, is the safety on, and how does my ability to **** a shotgun one-handed define me as a person! Then I masturbate and make the noises of cocking a shotgun, just so I can look myself in the mirror without being ashamed.
Actually, a Daywalker is a ginger who can go out in the sun for more than 3 minutes without getting sunburned, and/or one who has a normal complexion. I am both of those, but I still have freckles. Not saying I'm not a ginger (or ranga, as Australians have dubbed us), just a different strand of the genome. ;P